Feh, it's like I get the website to where I can simply update it, but then I can't find the time. Is there such thing as Premature Aging?
Honestly, I'm not sure anybody even reads this page anymore. I haven't had a signature in my guestbook since the Clinton administration.
Better get this out now: Saw Attack of the Clones 11 times. The first time dressed as Yoda with my wife more than a dozen of my other friends, being interviewed on News 8 Austin. Best part about that was the fact that my interview had my voice talking about how much I liked Star Wars while the screen showed clips from the movie. One of my interviews (the one right before walking in the door) was based on the premise that I was actually Yoda. My quote: "Much booty will I kick."
The last time I saw Episode 2 was with several people from the first group, including Ronda, up in Dallas at Texas' only theater with Digital Projection. I won't bore you with all of the details of what digital projection is, or why it's a big deal. Let's just say it made the 10 previous viewings of the movie look like I saw them through a fog.....digital projection is that good.
I'm sure some of you out there are wondering what I do with all of my time, since it obviously isn't being spent updating the website. Work has gotten incredibly busy, with me raising statistical hell down upon those who can't copy numbers correctly....of course, it's more technical than that, but that's basically what it boils down to. Warcraft III came out several weeks ago. After many attempts at playing online, I've determined that, given the means, I would personally like to hunt down every living soul who has ever played against me in that game. Of course, giving them credit as being living souls is misleading. I completely believe that 99% of the people on Battle.net are soulless devourers of all that is good. Evil beings bent on spitting and defiling normal, humane acts of decency into oblivion. And all of these people use Huntresses. Every. Single. One.
Of course, if you don't play the game, you can't possibly know of the joy of which I speak. Makes me want to go play my Gamecube on my new TV.
Sorry. Went into the future there. I don't have a TV yet. But plans have been set in motion. Plans the likes of which have yet to be seen by human eyes. Plans which, once revealed decades from now, historians will publish tomes of literature regarding how, in the unlikeliest of unlikelyhoods, Tony Smith was able to convince his wife Ronda that they not only desperately needed, but could afford, a 34" 16:9 Widescreen High Definition Television (yes, it must be capitalized).
Indeed, "Project: Digital Goodness" is not some quick, simple scheme...but an elaborate, in situ torrent of suggestions. Nuggets of well placed info timed with the very same accuracy that landed Man on the moon. Comments placed over the entire course of 2001-2002. Some would think environmental engineering, dealing with the statistics of rivers, bays, estuaries, and the like would equate to some pretty tough calculations. But the level of calculation involved in "Project: Digital Goodness" makes mathematical models of chaos theory pale in comparison. Seriously, how much information do you think is out there regarding how long 7 pair of boxer shorts can be made to last, and the subsequent money saved that can be put towards the purchase of digital bliss? I'm not a husband looking for the latest and greatest gadget, I'm a pioneer.
If successful (thus far my informants suggest a probability of success of 53%), I plan on publishing my work. I knew things were going well when, at Fry's several weeks ago, a Panasonic salesman gave Ronda two, count 'em two, Beanie-Baby Dalmations. You just can't plan that kind of luck.
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